Thursday, April 28, 2011

One Mom’s Journey: A Lesson in Love, Life, and Loss

Leo and Brendan

Jodi Rooney is the mother of three beautiful children, two here on earth and one up above. This is Jodi’s third year walking in March for Babies in memory of Brendan and in honor of Leo. She is team captain of top Family Team, Parent Talk.

Two months after finding out the big news of us having twins, I was placed on bed rest for premature thinning of my cervix. Two weeks later – five days after my daughter turned two – I was rushed to Brigham and Women’s for what was to be an emergency c-section to deliver my sons at 25 weeks and two days gestation. For me, I was delivered into my own personal hell.

My sons, later learned to be identical, laid still in the NICU weighing in at 1 pound, 15 ounces each. Hooked up to an unimaginable number of tubes and wires, they were no longer in the safe haven of my belly. I was no longer in control.

The first two days after the birth were a war zone. We were dodging the bullets of extreme prematurity. But it wouldn’t last long. The mother of all bombs exploded right in front of our faces. We were told that Baby B (second of the boys to be born, and whom we named Brendan) had a Grade 4 brain bleed, perforated lungs, and a failing heart. On Brendan’s fourth day of life we held our baby boy until he took his last breath. At that moment, the normal in my life was no longer. I was faced with grieving for my lost son and the trials of helping my other son, Leo, survive the next few months all the while ensuring my 2-year-old was getting what she needed.

After 100 days in two NICUs and almost a year of isolation (for fear of RSV or other illnesses that could be transmitted to Leo), I was able to ask myself how could I best give back to the community that has helped my family. The answers came to me very easily. The answers even helped me to see that I need not do this alone. My resilient family can be a part of this too. What better way to teach my children the gift of giving then by getting them involved in the cause. And the cause we focus on is the March of Dimes.

It has been three years this April since the start of this unexpected journey my family has taken. I can say that the early birth and death has given my life new meaning and direction. It has opened doors I never saw myself walking through. And I am grateful. Grateful for the new friends I have met, the grieving parents I have supported, and the idea that I can make a difference, even a small one, in the life of another person.

Fundraising Tips:
·        My children collect loose change throughout the year (they call it their March of Dimes money). In April, we turn the coins to cash and my kids do a donation on the team site. This year they collected over $200!
·        Ask a local restaurant to sponsor a fundraising event. Many are more than willing to help!
·        As incentive for people to donate a certain amount, I hold a raffle with one entry per $25 donated. I raffle off local gift cards, a donation to a charity, and the Macy’s gift card I earn from the MOD.
·        Every email I send has my fundraising banner. At times I add different messages right above the banner to explain the importance of raising funds.
·        As heartbreaking as it might be to read, I always share my story and how Leo would not be here today if it weren’t for the many advances in medicine that the March of Dimes supported and funded.

Leo at Age 3

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